Blog Schmog

Sometimes i don't want to update my blog. Its not that i don't want others to be able to read about our little lives. I just want to....commit technology suicide. Delete the upkeep of it all. Of course i also realize that it would be silly to discard those conveniences of life that i have come to depend on. I mean, technology is amazing. Really.
...But i still cant help but dream about something different.
I often daydream about living in the middle of a large field surround by a lush green forest. There would be no cell phones, no internet, no TV or movies, no email.... Nothing but me, my family, and the land. I would be free from the expectations, judgements, jealousy, rules, comparisons, ....that weigh on me now. I would wake each morning at 5am to tend to my garden, harvest my food, feed my family. I would be dependent on the earth, not a grocery store. I wouldn't need money, no shopping, no consumer lust. I would love, play with, and teach my children the best i know how. No schools, therapists, or government telling me how to do it (although they can be helpful, but along with that comes expectations....you know). We would read books (because i would have an unlimited library of them), explore nature, bake grainy bread, bask in the sun without getting burned... Of course, this land of mine would be equipped with a large house with plumbing and electricity, sunny 77 degree weather year round, no colds, flu, disease, no violence. And it would have a massive tree full of endless cocoa beans. Its the dreamland that i escape into when i feel like my days are eating away at me. You know, those days where there arent enough hours to get everything done because your to do list is so long. I feel like my to do list is always long. Because there is ALWAYS something to do at my house. There is always a room to clean, always a book i'm dying to read, always dishes to do, a spot to mop up on the floor, a sticky handprint on the wall, a spider that needs to be killed, and most importantly of all, always a child that needs attention, teaching, and love. And it is always in my head to never cut them short of those needs. When i do find a spot for myself (and it may be that 4 minute bathroom break that is so relieving in more than one way), i go to that "land" in my head that i am building which is just waiting for the day when i announce that i am falling off the grid. Anyone want to join me?